Be the Change

I've been struggling with how to deal with having a child in this violent world. How do I teach him that there's more good than bad in this world and not to hide out in a doomsday shelter? How do I teach him to be nice to people and the importance of being a decent human being? The best way to show him is to do it myself.

I want to do something nice for my fellow humans. I can't afford to donate hundreds of dollars to a charity, but I can afford to buy the order of the person behind me in the Starbucks drive thru. I can let the frazzled parents with the fussy baby go ahead of me in line at the grocery store. A small gesture can make a huge difference.


Image by Miss Turner (Flickr)

I want my son to grow up thinking it's normal to do something nice for others, that it's normal and not a special occurrence.

"Be the change that you want to see in the world." Who's with me?

Fort Worth TX Magazine Nurse-In

Warning: this post may be a little jumbled. I wanted to get my thoughts down ASAP

Today was the nurse-in in response to Fort Worth TX Magazine's March 2013 advice column. We had an amazing turnout - between 130 and 140 moms, dads, babies, older siblings, toddlers, and breastfeeding supporters alike. We were in front of the magazine's offices and held our signs proudly while speaking to news crews and talking about the whole incident.

The magazine's associate publisher, Diane Stow, came down to see us with a news crew next to her. She told us she had nursed all 4 of her children. She told us a story where she breastfed her child in public under a blanket. So let me get this straight: as a former nursing mom, she thought it was acceptable to publish an advice column encouraging readers to bully breastfeeding moms? Mrs. Stow told a local news station in a separate interview that the magazine never set out to offend anyone.
I was able to ask Mrs. Stow if the magazine planned on publishing a counter to Molly Forthright's piece or any other pro-breastfeeding piece. She told me she couldn't make editorial decisions because of something with advertising (it was loud, I couldn't hear her very well). I gave her my contact information and told her I'd be happy to help if they changed their minds.

This is what 100+ breastfeeding supporters look like! Click for larger picture

Overall, the nurse-in went well (see photo album here). We had several magazine employees come out and speak with the nurse-in participants. The magazine's food editor had baked us cookies, which were delicious. The magazine's owner could not be there because he was at a conference. No apology for encouraging antagonistic behavior towards a breastfeeding mom at church was made by Mrs. Stow or her employees. Frankly, I don't think they will ever apologize. They should be thankful for the publicity. I wonder if their advertisers know that the magazine advocates for bullying...

So now what?

Between the magazine article and the comments coming from most of the general public, it's obvious that breastfeeding needs to be normalized right here in my own backyard. There are two breastfeeding bills that are making their way through the Texas House of Representatives that need lots of support. HB 741 would extend current pump-at-work laws to all public employees (including teachers) and HB 1706 would provide enforcement to current nursing in public laws.

To anyone outraged over the magazine article or the lack of breastfeeding support from society, I urge you to channel those frustrations into positivity - help HB 741 and HB 1706 become laws! Visit TXBFLeg.com for examples of emails you can send to your representative and other ways to get normalize breastfeeding in Texas!!

Keep nursing in public! Don't confine yourself to a bathroom or side room, unless you want to. If you do see a nursing mom, praise her. I have a bunch of thanks for nursing in public cards and handed out more today at the nurse-in.

Even if "nothing" came of this nurse-in, it has gotten the topic of breastfeeding back on the radar. For every "don't want to see your saggy boobs" comment, there's a positive conversation going on. Maybe this will inspire a new mom to nurse in public without fear! This shouldn't be an issue, certainly not one we want our children to have to deal with. Do your part to help normalize breastfeeding!

Fort Worth, TX Magazine: NIP = Ick

My Facebook feed exploded on Friday, as the circulation of an article by Fort Worth, TX Magazine calling breastfeeding "icky" began to circulate. The piece in question was an advice column written by Molly Forthright. A reader was asking for advice on a breastfeeding mom at church who sat in the row ahead of them at church and seemed to distract the reader by feeding her child. Ms. Forthright started her response with "Ick." and then said the mother was "putting on a show in the house of the Lord".

She writes about her pet peeves of things people do in church and includes disruptive children. You know, like the kind that scream and cry if they aren't being fed when they get hungry. Oh, but don't breastfeed them.
Ms. Fortright then compares breastfeeding in church to clipping fingernails in church, talking on a cellphone in church, or eating a tunafish sandwich in church. She encourages her reader to do all three next time he/she sees this woman breastfeeding in church while sitting next to her.

I'm not going to get into the religious aspect of this topic since I'm not a churchgoer, although I've never seen a depiction of Mary bottle feeding Jesus. I will say that breastfeeding is NOT an invitation for ridicule or harassment, regardless of where it happens.

The irony is that Fort Worth is home to several large breastfeeding organizations, including the Human Milk Banking Association of North America's headquarters and Mothers' Milk Bank of North Texas. There's also a growing breastfeeding coalition and several breastfeeding support groups. Every hospital in the county is a part of a program looking to bridge the large drop in breastfeeding rates that occur after initiation. The magazine appears to be a big sponsor of an upcoming NICU support group's large fundraiser of the year. In fact, the NICU group's ad runs alongside the article in an online version of the magazine (see page 94-95).

For a writer to write a scathing response to such a question is sad. For a magazine to publish it online and in print is irresponsible and it makes me very angry.

As of this writing, the magazine has yet to issue a response to the deluge of emails, tweets, Facebook posts and messages, and phone calls it has received. I'll be sure to update with a response if it is provided. A few moms have reported receiving a canned email stating,

The opinions of our columnists do not always reflect the views of the magazine staff at large. From an editorial perspective, we feel it is of the utmost importance to include real voices from local writers whose words often inspire, challenge or otherwise make us stop to think about an issue we normally wouldn’t give second thought to.

The email also suggests that we check out their April issue about Alzheimer's disease and spring fashion. A nurse-in is being planned for this week. It will be called off if the magazine acknowledges their mistake before next Friday.
Hmm, this sure seems like a strong argument for HB 1706....

Thank You For Nursing in Public

A few weeks ago, I saw a mom nursing in public at an Indian restaurant. I don't see too many moms NIP, probably because many moms are afraid of negative feedback when they NIP. My husband even noticed (he's a lactivist by proxy) and said, "Hey, there's a nursing mom back there! Did you see? Get a card out." The business cards for my lactation education and counseling business have a thanks for nursing in public message on the back.

I waited until the person sitting across from her had gone up to get seconds from the buffet when I dropped off the thanks for NIP card at her table. I gave her a quick smile, told her she was doing a great job, and headed over to tandoori chicken and bhindi masala land (aka my heaven). I was a little nervous as to how she would react to the card. She gave me a smile after reading the card and when she left the restaurant. A few days later, I had an email from her.


This made me so very happy!

I am floored that my little thanks for NIP card had such an impact on her! I am also shocked that she felt ashamed for nursing her baby in public. No mother should feel ashamed for feeding their child! I don't think I fully understood the potential impact of these cards, but I am glad I gave her the confidence boost she needed. I wrote back and encouraged her to keep nursing and told her how wonderful she is for continuing to do what's best for her baby despite the rude comments and looks. I have given out a few of my NIP cards, but no one has ever written me letting me know how it affected them.

Have you ever given or received praise for nursing your LO in public?

Texas HB 1706: How You Can Help

Texas House Bill 1706 provides enforcement for current NIP laws and is scheduled for public hearing on March 12. Members in charge of the grassroots effort to support this bill have a Facebook group with examples of letters and contact info for the representatives involved.

They need letters from all breastfeeding organizations in Texas and other Texas pertinent groups in support of this bill. They also need to document as many NIP incidents as possible to demonstrate a need for an enforcement provision.



Nursing in public incidents can be sent to USBFLeg at gmail.com.

If you are a supporter of breastfeeding and you live in Texas, you can write a letter to your representative or to the members of the Business and Industry Committee. Please click here for examples of letters from individuals, click here for an example letter from an organization, or click here for Business & Industry committee contact info or scroll to the bottom for an example letter.
 
Keep your letters cordial and polite, short and sweet, and personalize them with your NIP experiences or fears. Be sure to introduce yourself as a constituent of your district. Example letters are below: first are example lettes from individuals, followed by example letters from organizations. Please click here or scroll to the bottom if you need an example letter from an organization. If you are looking for the where to email your letter, please click here or scroll to the bottom.

Example #1 - From an Individual

Hello Rep. _____,

I hope this email finds you well. As a resident of _______, I’m writing to ask for your support of House Bill 1706 sponsored by Rep. Farrar and Rep. King, and House Bill 741, sponsored by Rep. Walle and Rep. Hernandez Luna. Currently Texas law states "A mother is entitled to breast-feed her baby in any location in which the mother is authorized to be." However, this merely asserts her right. It does not protect her right, as there is currently no enforcement provision. Mothers are frequently discriminated against for feeding their children while they are out supporting the economy by shopping for their families and eating in restaurants. Fear of this discrimination prevents many mothers from choosing optimal nutrition for their babies as recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics, the World Health Organization, and others. HB 1706 will not only serve mothers and babies, it will inform businesses of the law and allow them to avoid the negative media attention that sometimes follows an incident where an ill-informed employee humiliates a mother who is trying only to feed her child.

In addition, House Bill 741 would extend worksite pumping protections to salaried public employees. Currently, state employees like teachers are often forced to choose between providing breastmilk for their babies or keeping their jobs. HB 741 would give these working mothers the same protection that is already afforded to hourly workers under federal law: reasonable accommodations for pumping milk for babies up to a year old.

As a breastfeeding mom and an advocate for mothers and children, I urge you to support this legislation as we take this to a new level and truly protect a woman’s right to breastfeed. HB 1706 has already received media coverage from Dallas Observer, Houston Press, The Spring Observer, and The Stir (links below). I would love the opportunity to meet with you to discuss this public health issue. Thank you for your time!

Sincerely,
____________
___Contact Info____

http://tinyurl.com/hb1706dallasobserver
http://tinyurl.com/hb1706houstonpress
http://tinyurl.com/hb1706springobserver
http://tinyurl.com/hb1706cafemom

Example #2 - From an Individual

Hello Representative _______,

I am a breastfeeding mother living in __________, and it has come to my attention that House Bills 1706 and 741, sponsored by Representatives Farrar and King, and Walle and Hernandez Luna, respectively, are pending in committee. I ask that you support them. Under the current law, a woman has the right to breastfeed in any location that she has permission to be. However, because there are currently no consequences for disturbing a breastfeeding mother, this law is often violated. Additionally, federal law requires that working mothers paid on an hourly basis receive reasonable breaks for pumping and a space to do it in, but there is no protection like this for salaried public employees such as teachers.

I ask that you help us to support these pieces of legislation so that we can give our children the best possible nutrition without fear of harassment; so mothers won't be forced to choose between their babies and their jobs. This topic has received media coverage from The Dallas Observer, The Spring Observer, and Houston Press, and The Stir (see links below). I would appreciate an opportunity to meet with you to discuss this public health issue. Thank you for your consideration.

Sincerely,
_______________
___Contact Info____

http://tinyurl.com/hb1706dallasobserver
http://tinyurl.com/hb1706houstonpress
http://tinyurl.com/hb1706springobserver
http://tinyurl.com/hb1706cafemom

Example #3 - From an Individual

Hello Rep. ______ ,
I hope this email finds you well. I am a mother who resides in the State of Texas and I am writing to ask for your support for House Bill 1706, sponsored by Rep. Farrar and Rep. King. Texas law already recognizes breastfeeding as the best method of infant nutrition and entitles a mother to breastfeed her baby in any location in which the mother is authorized to be; however she is not truly protected because there is no enforcement of that law and is thus at risk of being bullied.
Breastmilk is the ideal food for newborns and infants. It gives infants all the nutrients they need for healthy development. It is safe and contains antibodies that help protect infants from common childhood illnesses - such as diarrhea and pneumonia, the two primary causes of child mortality worldwide. Breastmilk is readily available and affordable, which helps to ensure that infants get adequate sustenance (World Health Organization, 2012).
As a breastfeeding mom and advocate for mothers and children, I urge you to support this legislation to better protect a woman’s right to breastfeed. I would welcome the chance to meet with you to further discuss the importance of community support and breastfeeding!
Thank you for your time and support,
______________________
___Contact Info____

Example #4 - From an Individual

Dear Rep. __________,
I'm a new mother in ______, TX, and I breastfeed my baby. Currently, state law asserts that I have the right to nurse my baby anywhere that I am authorized to be... but that hasn't stopped people from asking me to move to a private area when I breastfeed my ______, or telling me that I need to cover up with a blanket (even though I take care not to expose myself).
Other Texas women have been harassed even more harshly than I, have been humiliated publicly, and have been banished from public places, all for giving their babies the very best food available: breastmilk. This has caused many of my friends to avoid nursing in public at all costs, which incidentally has a side effect of depriving local businesses of potential customers.
HB 1706 would amend the law to create a private right of action as a recourse for mothers who are discriminated against or harassed for nursing in any public place where they are already allowed to be. Please support this bill, and support Texas mothers.
Thank you,
__________ and son/daughter __________ (___ months)
___Contact Info____

Example #5 - From an Individual

Hello Rep ____,
I am a constituent of your district ___ and breastfed/am breastfeeding my child(ren). I’m writing to ask your support for House Bill 1706, sponsored by Rep. Farrar and Rep. King. Texas law already recognizes breastfeeding as the best method of infant nutrition and entitles a mother to breastfeed her baby in any location in which the mother is authorized to be; however she is not truly protected because there is no enforcement of that law, leaving her at risk of being bullied.
Mothers like me are frequently discriminated against for feeding their children in public. This happens at malls, restaurants, and parks across the state. [optional: insert your NIP incident here] The fear of being belittled by another person can be enough motivation for some moms not to breastfeed, despite recommendations from some of the biggest health organizations in the world including the AAP and WHO. The benefits of breastfeeding are well known, but a nervous new mom may choose not to breastfeed to avoid potential public ridicule.
HB 1706 will not only serve mothers and babies, it will ensure that businesses and their employees are up to date on what the law protects. As a breastfeeding mom and advocate for mothers and children, I urge you to support this legislation as we strive to truly protect a woman’s right to breastfeed.
Thank you for your time and support,
______________________
___Contact Info____

---

 
Letters from organizations should begin with an introduction of your group. They should talk about health benefits of BF, how you support BF, and HB 1706. Letters from a mom should be personalized from the mom's point of view, but these letters should be personalized from the organization's view. Letters should be polite, of course (not antagonistic or accusing). These letters can be more lengthy than the 2 paragraph max for letters from individuals (but still somewhat brief). Include contact information with the signature. See sample letter below.

Please include a contact name, physical address, zip code, and phone number(s) to receive a reply (make clear that you represent constituents outside of just your zip code, if that is the case.

Example #6 - from Organization

Hello Rep. ________,

We are the _____________ located in __________, Texas. We ____(serve the community in this way)________. We are asking that you support House Bill 1706, sponsored by Rep. Farrar and Rep. King. Texas law already recognizes breastfeeding as the best method of infant nutrition and entitles a mother to breastfeed her baby in any location in which the mother is authorized to be; however she is not truly protected because there is no enforcement of that law, and she is thus at risk of being harassed.

There is a large push in the state to increase breastfeeding rates through initiatives like Baby-Friendly Hospital designations and Texas Ten Step Star Achiever Breastfeeding Learning Collaborative. Only 13.7% of Texan mothers exclusively breastfeed for the first six months of life as recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics, the World Health Organization, and other leading health organizations. Initiatives like those mentioned call for support from the community to improve breastfeeding rates.

Mothers are frequently discriminated against for feeding their children while they are out supporting the economy as mothers do. Fear of this discrimination prevents many mothers from choosing optimal nutrition for their babies. HB 1706 will not only serve mothers and babies, it will inform businesses of the law and allow them to avoid the negative media attention that sometimes follows an incident where an ill-informed employee humiliates a mother who is trying only to feed her child.

As representatives of many of your constituents, we urge you to support this legislation as we take this to a new level and truly protect a woman’s right to breastfeed. We are available as a resource to you if you would be available to further discuss the importance of community support and breastfeeding!

Best Regards,

____Your Organization____
Organization Contact info

 
Please send letters to the Business & Industry committee members:

1. **Committee Chair** Rep. Rene Oliveira - D - District 37: Rene.Oliveira@house.state.tx.us
2. **Committee Vice Chair** Rep. Dwayne Bohac - R - District 138: dwayne.bohac@house.state.tx.us
3. Rep. Armando Walle - D - District 140: Armando.Walle@house.state.tx.us
4. Rep. Jason Villalba - R - District 114: Jason.Villalba@house.state.tx.us
5. Rep. Rob Orr - R- District 58: Rob.Orr@house.state.tx.us
6. Rep. Eddie Rodriguez - D - District 51: Eddie.Rodriguez@house.state.tx.us
7. Rep. Paul Workman - R - District 47: paul.workman@house.state.tx.us

You can also send letters to your local representative, even if they aren't a part of the Business & Industry Committee. Find your representative here
Please help spread the word. if you are a member of a breastfeeding organization or coalition, medical organization, or know someone who is, please share this information! By working together, we can help enforce current NIP laws in Texas!

The example letters were written by several volunteers in the We Support Texas Breastfeeding Laws With Enforcement Facebook group. Thank you ladies!